If you don't want me to punch you in the face

Learn to operate your camera before you take a picture of me. If you ask me to be in your photo, that's fine. I expect to be stationary for a few seconds while you take the photo. I won't stand there for a year while you figure out how to turn your camera on. Read the damn instructions before you bring your camera out in public and try to use it. Are you 80? Are you incapable of using technology? What is your problem? Most digital cameras work in exactly the same way. There is a button marked "ON" or "POWER". You press it. There is another button for taking a photo. You press it. DONE.

WHAT ABOUT THIS DO YOU FIND SO GODDAMN DIFFICULT?!?!

Let me tell you a story. My grandma had a gathering, which the whole family was invited to. This is rare, as we have a large family who all live far apart, so we decided we needed a photo. My grandmother's friend gets her camera and proceeds to take a fucking hour to get it to work, while we are all standing awkwardly by the window. My family includes a large number of small children. I am the oldest in my generation, so the family have decided that it's me who gets to look after all of their kids. My family are mostly fundies, who take the "go forth and multiply" thing really seriously. LOTS of kids. Weird kids. So it's been decided that it's my job to keep them all still, for an hour, while a stupid old person tries and fails to press the "ON" button. It wouldn't have been so bad had she not refused any and all help. My opinion: if you are too far gone to be able to press one button, either let someone else do it for you or DIE.

This issue is one which irritates me. There is a certain level of intelligence that you should not fall below. If you do, you perhaps should be removed from our society to prevent undesired genes from being passed on. If you cannot press one button, perhaps you are one of those people. Our society DOES NOT NEED YOU.

/rant

Dear weird black hair,

How did you get into my bra? Who do you belong to? Did you stick there in the wash and go unnoticed until I got dressed, or did you transfer from my shirt? Are you even a human hair? I know you certainly aren't mine, and no one in my house has black hair. Please explain.


Sincerely,

Me.